Neighboring Duties

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Well hello everyone. It’s good to be here tonight. The last year has been a crazy year of growth. Who would have guessed that a shutdown over what the government leaders have classified as a worldwide pandemic would be a blessing for our church. Tonight I continue the Centers and Circumferences series on speaking on neighboring duties, Christian’s call to ministry.

Each of us ought to consider how we can be a blessing to our neighbor. My focus is going to be more on our body life versus those who would live in our neighborhood, but these principles would apply. I feel with all the new members coming, this would be good to think about ways that we could actually encourage one another and build each other up. The growth in our attendance, it’s been a blessing. It has been good to have more families to meet and enjoy fellowship with. There are still many names to learn and families to invite over for family fellowship dinners. Above all, the mission of our church is to be laboring and joy to cultivate a Trinitarian community of worshiping, maturing disciples who acknowledge Jesus Christ as Lord over the world. The fact that we are here means that there is work for us to do. There are relationships to build up. If we are going to make Marysville and our surrounding cities great, it begins with us worshipping the Lord and serving our neighbors to the glory of His name. Let us consider Ephesians 4, 11 through 16.

And He gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds, and teachers to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ until we all attain to the unity of faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ so that we may no longer be children tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine by human cunning by craftiness in deceitful schemes rather speaking the truth and love we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head into Christ and from whom the whole body joined in hell together by every joint with which it is equipped when each part is working properly makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love. Each of us is called for to the work of ministry. It is a blessing to watch our flock encourage and pursue one another more and more to holiness. There are many of us on different levels involved with discipleship relationships. God has blessed us with Saints who are doing the

work. One of the things that has encouraged the elders is watching our people step up and minister to our brothers and sisters. Praise be to God for the grace and gifts he has given each of us and how we are growing and using these for the sake of building up our neighbor.

Let us consider some important foundation blocks as we think about our neighboring duties. Matthew 22, 33 through 39, no, 37 through 39. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment and the second is like it. You shall love your neighbor as yourself. So block number one, you must love the Lord above all. Motives matter. We must find joy in loving the Lord where He has us. The best way to check your heart is to ask yourself, what are you doing and why are you doing that? Questions are a great way to get to the heart. As we labor and build, we must do everything in the name of the Lord.

There is nothing too small to be done in the fear of the Lord. The alternative is the fear of man, which is only laying a trap and your return on investment is death. Block number two, you must love your neighbor as yourself. It’s simple, treat others the way you would want to be treated. It is easy to treat others in a manner that you would not want to be treated. If you are going to be a blessing to your neighboring duties, it is important that we obey the Lord as we love our neighbor. A simple question to ask would be, would I like this to be done to me? Consider what Jesus said in John 13, 34 through 35. A new commandment I give to you that you love one another just as I have loved you.

You also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples if you love one another, if you have love for one another. Our love for one another is to be just as Jesus loved us. The deal is that we have to be all in with our hearts. Love for God and love for his people cannot be separated. A fruit that you love God is that you love his people. First John 3.16 tells us, by this we know love. He laid down his life for us. We ought to lay down our lives for the brothers.

What are some building blocks that we should be laying so that we can be strong in our neighboring duties? Some areas that we can consider is prayer. It is very important that we are praying for one another. Sometimes we can come alongside a brother or sister and pray for them. This is huge encouragement and it shows that we desire them to grow and that we want the Lord to help them. Another way of growing in our prayers for one another is to just listening and asking how they are doing. Oftentimes, if we are quick or moving to and fro, we miss the opportunities to hear how our people are really doing. So taking the time to listen and to take that in is important.

Some of the best opportunities for growth here is to attend a life-to-life group. Usually there is time to talk with people before and after, and then usually in the discussion, if you’re listening to the people, you’re gonna hear some things that are on their hearts, and it gives you ways to pray for them and to encourage them throughout the week.

But learning to pray and follow up is a way to bless your neighbor. It’s one that I try to get better at is following up. Oftentimes I tell people I’m praying for them, but then I fail to actually check in and see how that went. So that is one way to bless your neighbor.

Husbands, men need to stop leaving their manhood at the door of their homes, churches, and their workplaces. Men need to embrace their masculinity and that starts with their leadership. A husband needs to understand that he is the leader of the home and is on call 24-7. Soft men do not lead. They are more interested in being a nice guy than everyone likes. The approval of others is their end game, and it makes a marriage struggle because nice guys usually care about their wives’ approval. And in that case, they avoid anything that might cause conflict. A man that is masculine will not be afraid of leading his wife, even if it causes conflict.

Husbands are responsible for building up their wives. And so we need to fear the Lord rather than our wives’ approval. On a side note, husbands, do you realize that you could love your wife as Christ loved the church and you will still have a problem? Now don’t misunderstand me when what I’m saying here is we are called to love our wives as Christ loved the church. But this does not fix that our wives are cursed. Consider Genesis 3.16. “‘Your desire shall be for your husband “‘and he shall rule over you.‘” John MacArthur says, because of sin and the curse, the man and woman will face struggles in their own relationship.

Sin has turned the harmonious system of God ordained roles into distasteful struggles of self-will. Lifelong companions, husbands and wives will need God’s help in getting along as a result. So husbands, consider how you are shepherding your wife and leading her. Wives, women need to be feminine. The world around you wants to think that you are better than men and that you do not need them. But if you want to embrace true feminine virtues, it starts with your submission and respect. Whether that be your father or husband, you need to let that man lead you. I remember one time when Jolie was meeting an older woman, and this woman gave Jolie the idea of letting me leave my home.

Jolie came home and told me that it all rested on my shoulders. And I was like, this is a joke. But obviously I needed to grow into my man pants and this was the right kind of weight for my shoulders. It made me think about my leadership because she put me in the best position to take responsibility. Women need to remember that it is not their job to pick up their husband’s responsibility. You are not being a good neighbor when you try to protect your husband’s bad leadership. Sisters, how is your submission and respect for the man in your home? The idea here is to understand that God has given males and females different roles and responsibilities.

Each of us is to be striving and laboring to be the man and woman that we are called to be. If a man is acting like a woman, or a woman is acting like a man, God is not honored and it will hinder us in our neighboring duties. Get to know others. It is easy to be uncomfortable around new people, whether at church, in your neighborhood, or in your workplace. But if we are going to rock the neighboring duties, we need to invest time for conversations. One of the best ways to get to know others is to invite them over for, let’s say a family fellowship dinner. It does not have to be on a Sunday, but it’s already scheduled every second and fourth Sunday, so why not take advantage of that opportunity?

Another option is for men to attend Men to Men, and ladies to attend Titus II. There are other ways to do things, but these are just ways that you can get to know people, and it’ll allow you to be a better neighbor, because you’ll know your flock better. Think about it and be creative, but do something. Don’t just come to church and leave and check out for the rest of the week. Find ways to actually pour in to get to know other people. Encourage others. Consider Romans 1, 11 through 12. Paul says, for I long to see you that I may impart to you some spiritual gift to strengthen you. That is that you may be, that we may be mutually encouraged by one another’s faith.

Our faith is a tool for encouragement. When we share what we are learning and how we are growing, it will encourage others. It is also another way to stir others towards growth. You can let others know when you are praying for them. Whenever someone asks me how they can pray for me, I’m always encouraged, I need prayer, a lot of it. Serve others. Look for ways to serve the people around you. It does not need to be a church event. There may be many organizations in the community where you can volunteer and serve with others in the community. Often there are serving opportunities with our church and even ECS events.

There is plenty of work to be done. Other opportunities would be serving a family that just had a baby or someone that had an injury by providing them a meal. But investing and getting involved is good because when you’re working together, you’re gonna learn more about each other and where we’re weak and where we’re strong. And it gives you more things to know about them and how to encourage them. Sometimes things are posted on Facebook. So if you’re looking for opportunities, if you’re not on Facebook, that’s one way to know what’s going on and how you can get involved. Sometimes you can go to the Deacons. There are always physical needs.

People are, maybe they’re moving, need furniture moved or yard work. And so, but these are opportunities that, we could be a good neighbor, bless them, get to know them and continue to build each other up. Share Christ. Who knows where the people in your world are, but as you learn about them and have conversations, do not hide the gospel and pray for opportunities to share about Jesus Christ. You don’t need to establish this full on perfect relationship, sometimes it just starts with listening to them and starting a conversation where they’re at.

I mean it shouldn’t be like a year later that they find out that you’re a Christian. They should know sooner than later. And sometimes, people you meet, you grow those relationships, they may not even be interested in Jesus. And that’s okay, that’s still an opportunity for you to invest, to try to show them Christ in your words and your actions and how you handle life. Maybe they’ll see you do something that they normally would freak out and they’ll ask questions like, what’s the hope in you? And you can tell them more. God uses means to accomplish his goals so be bold and courageous with the people that he allows you to have in your path crossings. Discipleship relationships.

It is good to look for personal discipleship relationships. There are always new disciples, new disciples and older and wiser disciples. Men need to find time to hang out with other men and ladies need to find time to hang out with other ladies. we need that sharpening. We need to be challenging one another and pushing one another so we can be better in our homes or in our workplaces or wherever the Lord has us.

You should consider who you can pour into and who can you glean from. I mean, years ago I heard someone talk about getting in someone’s back pocket. That’s a way that you don’t really need to actually be having a one-on-one thing, but you kinda find ways to watch them, pay attention, learn from them. You can always learn from watching people and so when you have saints that are strong and mature in the faith, we should be paying attention and trying to emulate that in our life. Not being them but trying to use that to strengthen our own faith. In terms of discipleship relationships, you know, it could be one-on-one or even smaller groups. It would even better be better if you could line up with someone in your L2L group, someone that you can share more life with.

You know, you’re on the same page, you guys are like reading the same book or going to the same life group, hearing the same thing, so it helps for you guys to talk about those things. You just need to look for a way to carve out some time and be intentional. Parenting. Parenting is the biggest blessing. At the same time, it can be one of the most challenging seasons depending on the circumstances. Parents need to make sure to pay attention to their children and how they can disciple them up in the nurture and discipline of the Lord. You need to know who their friends are, like who they’re hanging out with, who they’re not hanging around with, and what kind of influence are these kids having on your kids’ lives.

Just to let them run off and hang out with whoever is not going to be wise. You need to know the condition of your kids, and you need to know what they’re hearing and what they’re doing and how you can actually try to help disciple them so they can grow up and be mature in the Lord. For an opportunity to be a blessing, consider all the new babies in our congregation. Praise the Lord. There are lots of opportunities for younger ladies to come alongside these mothers and serve them. That would be a huge blessing. I mean, when you have a house full and you have little ones, like, you mothers know how that goes. It’s challenging.

I remember when I had to watch just our two girls when Julie would go out and like, man, it’s challenging. Like, she’s a lot of work there. So I praise the Lord for mothers, but also, I always encourage my daughters to find ways to serve other mothers and to learn and grow, because I want them to grow up to be, you know, godly and growing women who can actually have a big capacity for their family when the Lord allows that to happen.

Plus, it gives a good opportunity for some discipleship. Usually the younger ladies are gonna see the moms in action and be able to have conversations or see things and be able to learn and grow in that capacity as well. When it comes to parenting, fathers, what is your vision for your children? Do they know why you are doing what you’re doing? And do they know where you hope to see them in one year, three years, five years? Do your children know what it means to come from or be a part of your household? What does it mean to be a hall? Think about that. What do they think? Remember that parenting is about raising future parents.

So labor in a way that they are stronger when they have children than when you started. Bearing burdens. Galatians 6.1 says, brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. We have a duty to bear one another burdens. This is part of our neighboring duties. The goal is to restore brother back into fellowship. We are reminded for the need for gentleness. Often those who are treated in a rough way end up despising the Lord’s discipline. Have you ever encountered someone who was trying, who was in a position to help you, but because they lack gentleness, you did not want what was best for you?

Without gentleness, one will not be able to restore anyone caught in any sin. When you are confronting and rebuking, So when our confronting and rebukes are bathed with a spirit of gentleness, it is a seed that God can grow towards forgiveness and reconciliation and fellowship. Workplace. Wherever the Lord would have us outside the home, we must be the kind of disciples that produce excellent work. Excellence here is getting after God’s glory and your neighbor’s good. We want our work to bless the lives of those we serve. I love this quote from the Art of Neighboring. The command to love our neighbor lies at the core of God’s plan for our lives.

And when we follow this mandate, it changes everything. The journey begins when we choose a lifestyle of conversation and community over a lifestyle of busyness and accumulation. It’s about making room for life and choosing to befriend those God has placed around us. And so in the workplace, Like, this is a wonderful opportunity to befriend people that aren’t normally in your home or in your neighborhood. I remember a few opportunities I found at my job. One of our shop guys had to help his dad with a doctor appointment, and he was worried and stressed. I was able to encourage him by asking what was the issue and also that I was praying for him, and for him to be strong and leading here.

He didn’t feel like he had what it took, and I said, I think you do. After the appointment, I texted him and check in and his response was like, wow, I’m surprised that you even checked in and this really has encouraged me, like reaching out in this manner. So it’s these little investments that you do when you make time for them. Like if you’re just busy, not paying attention to people, then you’re going to miss out on a lot of opportunities to be a good neighbor to them.

Another opportunity was someone I was working with was sharing about how him and wife were looking for a new house. They were having a hard time finding a house because like everything you put an offer in is like overbidded on so everything they were putting a bid on was you know they weren’t getting it and I like well I’m praying for you all and I kept on checking and asking you guys finally get that house? No. I’m praying you guys are gonna get a house just wait and they ended up getting one but for him it was an encouragement for to see somebody who didn’t have to care at all just you know hey like I actually was trying to show him that I really did care about where he was what he He wanted, you know, his desire is to someday to have a family, and you know, this would be a great opportunity to have a place to build that.

And so the Lord blessed him, and I was thankful to be a part of that part of his story. But get to know your coworkers and how you can pray for them and encourage them in their work and personal lives. God will use you, just step out and engage the people wherever He has you, whether that’s in your work or your neighborhood. It doesn’t matter. You know, we have a bunch of new people coming here on Sunday, so those are opportunities as well. Children, learn to love obedience. The Lord is honored when you honor and respect your parents. Where do you need to grow in your obedience? If there are areas you struggle, write out some goals and consider how you can grow in those areas where you might be weak.

Let your parents know and ask them to hold you accountable. Above all, children, honor your parents, For this comes with a promise that it will go well with you, and that you may live long in the land. In this way, our city will be more blessed. Another thing to consider for neighboring duties with the children is we have a lot of older saints here, and oftentimes kids have fun and they like to run, which is great, but when you got older saints, that’s a hazard to happen. So the children could consider how to be a good neighbor in that, and not, if you’re gonna run, go outside, but if you’ve got the older saints here, it doesn’t take much to hurt them.

But that is a way for us to love our neighbors. Fathers, help your children grow a strong work ethic. I would imagine a good place to start, to build a strong work ethic could be school work and chores. Those are fun. These are our ways to be a blessing to your neighbor. I mean, I always try to tell my daughters, Caitlin’s not in school anymore, but Addison, Like, you know, when you do your work well, like you are a blessing to your teacher. Like that, that brings them joy in their work. Like who wants to deal with students who don’t do the work, who hate it, who just grumble, complain. And so part of that strong worth ethic is trying to have joy with whatever the Lord is putting before you.

And if that’s algebra, like, well, let’s get after it. And don’t stop there. You know, keep growing your work capacity. Every day you have the opportunity to be godly and growing example to those around you. You know, you children, the younger ones, you all can be an encouragement to the older saints. You know, we’re watching, we’re paying attention and it really does bring joy to our hearts when we see you acting in a godly and growing way. You know, because we are praying for you. We’re, you know, for those that have been baptized, we pray that God will continue to grow you, strengthen you and allow you to be a blessing in our community.

And so you don’t need to be an adult to be blessing your neighbor. You just gotta look at where you’re at and be doing the best that you can there. While the building blocks I shared will help remind you of some neighboring duties, it is not an exhaustive list. I would encourage you to think about where you can bless your neighbor and what it looks like for you to plan making that a part of your life. Above all, our neighboring duties start with worship. Every Sunday we are called to worship, And every other day is an opportunity to worship the Lord in how we live our lives to his glory. We each have neighboring duties, and we must remember that there is not one duty that we have that Christ does not claim is his.

We need to understand that there are gonna be times that we sin and do not do what’s best for our neighbor. That’s gonna happen. Repent and get back after it. Don’t stop, don’t be in despair. You need to learn and grow. You need to persevere. The race, it’s a, this race to the end is a marathon, and we don’t want to just go full on like today. Like, you know, you gotta learn to practice discipline. You know, you don’t become a good neighbor overnight. You gotta learn, you know, to practice that, you know, whether that’s in your home or in your neighborhood. I mean, but it’s small steps. What small steps can you take to actually move the needle to growing in that capacity?

That’s something to consider. Consider Galatians 6, 9 through 10, if you do struggle and grow weary, because it says, let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap if we do not give up. So then as we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone and especially those who are of the household of faith. Here we have a promise that if we do not grow weary in doing good, we will reap a harvest if we stay the course. Labor and work hard and bring in the harvest. Sow the seeds and trust that God is gonna bring that harvest, but don’t doubt. God promises that if you are faithful, you don’t grow weary and you keep getting after it, he is gonna bless that.

And so we need to trust him and be ready to bring it in. For the men of our households, you must have a mission for your life. Some intentional plan for how you will build God’s kingdom and bring him glory. through all that He has given you. Maybe you have a plan and maybe you don’t. God works through means and you need to know where you’re going and how you plan to get there. And so I bring up men because we are the mission. We need to know where we’re taking our families. If we want Mary’sville to be great again, that starts with us. You know, if the men check out, it does hinder the homes.

Like, you know, I don’t think people, I never really realized how much, like, influence fathers have until I worked helping hands where these foster kids would come in and like they love their fathers and their fathers were doing bad things like the parents were misbehaving but they still have and so I can imagine that if you were being a parent you’re pouring into your kids and you’re actually like being a good neighbor like you have a lot of influence you can like you can do some amazing things if you would just mold and shape them and consider like making sure that you have a mission and they know where you’re going because if they don’t know where you’re going, they’re just gonna find something else to do.

And that’s not what we want. Some of us, and some of us have ended up where we never thought we would end up. I mean, you think you have a plan and then you get after it and then all of a sudden you’re somewhere else and you’re like, okay, well the Lord, this is where he wanted me to be. So be content, be thankful. You never know where God’s gonna take you. You never know who you’re gonna run into, but things could happen, you can change people’s lives by considering who’s your neighbor in front of you and how you can bless them. Some of you might not know where to start in terms of trying to be a better neighbor.

Maybe you’re really busy. And so you’re like, man, I don’t know if I have time. This isn’t in my wheelhouse. Well, I want to just share some things that I’ve done that have allowed me to grow and influence relationships in my neighbor and duties in ways that I’ve been able to connect with friends and family. Texting some messages of encouragement. I text all the time when it’s appropriate But I do text because you know I can’t see everyone all the time so it could take a second to text somebody and it’s it could it will encourage them You know and so you know it’s a way to find out how people are doing how you can be praying You know just this is a way of being a good neighbor I don’t know about you, but I have a lot of windshield time You know, after I get off my main job, I do measures and there’s times I’ve got to drive up to Bellingham.

So, but even without that, any time I’ve driven, I’ve always felt that that’s an opportunity to call people that you love and care about, that you have investments in, and to connect with them and talk. You know, it’s better than a text. It’s not, it would be better to meet face to face, but that doesn’t always, you know, that always cannot happen. You know, and I’ve also found that Marco Polo is a fantastic app. I don’t know if you guys use it, but it’s really cool. Like you can sit there and actually like have a walkie-talkie video session. So you can, you know, it’s like FaceTime. You record, say something, they send it, they get it, they can reply, and so you get to see facial expressions.

I mean, especially for people that are long distance and in another, you know, they’re not in your vicinity. It’s really helpful to, you know, to connect because then they can check it and do it whenever. But I’ve often found encouragement through that too. Think about how you can give your time to the person in front of you, whether at work, at home, or wherever you are. If you are distracted, it shows the person in front of you that you don’t care and they are not blessed by your interaction. When someone comes to you, and that could be your sibling, spouse, teacher, or boss, make it a point to discipline yourself to not be distracted and just listen.

Have you ever talked to someone who was multitasking? You know, it’s like, it’s horrible. Like, I mean, you’re telling them that you don’t care, that you’re just not even interested in whatever they want to be sharing with you. And so, and it’s hard, I can tend to struggle. I try to really focus on putting down whatever I’m doing and giving people my attention. But find a way to build some habits that put the focus on the person in front of you. Start there and build from that. The goal is to not be perfect, but to do good and to not grow weary in doing good. blessing others is hard work. What do you do when it gets hard?

Well first you wanna just pray for God’s strength and joy. Keep going, don’t stop, keep getting after it. For further encouragement, you could listen to Shawn’s message, 2 Corinthians 4. It’s a hard message and good. I think he’s preached it a couple times, but if you need to have encouragement about being spent, worn out over and over and over again, like a thousand deaths, there you go. Listen, you’ll be encouraged. Maybe you can find some Bible verses to meditate on. I’ve always been encouraged by Philippians 1, 21 through 26, which says, for me to live is Christ and to die is gain. If I am to live in the flesh, that means fruitful labor for me.

Yet which I shall choose I cannot tell. I am hard pressed between the two. My desire is to depart and be with Christ for that is far better. But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account. Convinced of this, I know that I will remain and continue with you all for your progress and joy in the faith so that in me you may have ample cause to glory in Christ Jesus because of me coming to you again. Side note, many rapture believing Christians would rather be with Christ than deal with the mess that surrounds them. They are disconnected from their covenant with God and his people. They desire the rapture to happen because of what it takes them away from.

You know, things get hard and they’re like, I just wish Jesus would come back right now. Well, he’s not and we need to get to work. It’s like, they want an easy road to heaven. But being kyperian means that we are called to get dirty and to help those around us until God takes us whether by rapture or death. Like we are not sitting back and not working. We are getting after it and just conquer. Back to Philippians. If we are going to be a blessing in our neighboring duties, we must remember Christ who is our life. Following in his example, while God saves sinners, We can give our life for others. Let us choose to remain and be spent and to sacrifice for the progress and joy of our people in the faith.

It is not an easy life, and that seems to be why Paul says to die is gain. In death we find victory. In the life to come, there is no sin, no weakness or death, but our glorified bodies, and we are with the Lord Jesus for all eternity. In that we gain. Our life must be spent for others. This week will be a good opportunity to labor in our neighboring duties in such a way that God will bless it and cause much fruit to abound in the lives of those around us. We can make a difference in the life of others. The problem is that it is costly work. It is much easier to write a check from your bank account rather than one from your own life.

Father God, we do pray, and I pray that you would use this message, that you would stir our hearts, continue to allow us to make progress, and continue to have us work for the progress and joy of our people and that you are coming back and we do want to be ready but we want to labor in a way that we are ready for the glory to come so may we find ways to do that here thank you for our neighbors thank you for the many new neighbors and I pray that you would strengthen us with your strength with your joy help us to consider how we can be Christian to be godly and growing to be a good example Lord, ultimately, Lord, help us to look for ways to invest and to build up this body. And may we look to our neighbor, whoever that may be. We pray that in Jesus’ name, amen.

Father God, we do pray, and I pray that you would use this message, that you would stir our hearts, continue to allow us to make progress, and continue to have us work for the progress and joy of our people and that you are coming back and we do want to be ready but we want to labor in a way that we are ready for the glory to come so may we find ways to do that here thank you for our neighbors thank you for the many new neighbors and I pray that you would strengthen us with your strength with your joy help us to consider how we can be Christian to be godly and growing to be a good example Lord, ultimately, Lord, help us to look for ways to invest and to build up this body.